Outside the rain was coming down so hard that I could not even see the parking lot beyond the hospital room window. It was over, and just as the doctor and nurses left the room, the electricity went out and after about 10 seconds the back-up generator came on. Although the lights in my room remained off, the room was softly lit by the pale gray glow from the storm outside. I remember being thankful that the electric hadn't gone out sooner, as well as feeling comforted by the heavy rains that were drowning out all the noise of the world. Although I was not a Christian yet, I felt that something beyond me created those few minutes in time where the whole world seemed to stop, as if to acknowledge that something important just happened.
In fact, something important had just happened, Simon Andrew was born!
Like the dream of a little blond-haired boy named Simon 2 nights before I knew I was pregnant. At the time, my exact words were, "That's the stupidist name I've ever heard. I would never name my child Simon!" I may not have believed in God at the time, but He already had plans for Simon, including his name, and so "the stupidist name I've ever heard" soon became a name I love dearly.
Or how about the drive to the hospital when we ran over a snake in the road? Other than being freaked out, wondering if somehow the snake could have gotten caught on the tire and might somehow still be alive and about to slither into the car (thankfully it wasn't/ didn't!), that isn't a moment I've thought much about since then, but now Genesis 3:15 comes to mind, "And I will put enmity between you and the woman, and between your offspring and hers; he will crush your head, and you will strike his heel."
One thing I did think about was the number 22. Simon was born on Aug 22 at 2:20 pm when I was 22 years old. It wasn't the last time I'd notice the number 22 in connetion with Simon.
Simon was 5 weeks premature and could not even maintain his own body temperature for the first 8 hours after he was born, so he was taken to the nursery where he was kept under a warming light- like a fast food burger! He would get so tired after just 3-4 small sips from his tiny bottle that he would fall asleep, so the doctor decided that he needed to stay in the hospital until he was eating better. Now I am not your typical mom who can't be away from her baby (I live on the opposite side of the world from him now!), but leaving him in the hospital that second night after he was born was almost as painful as childbirth itself. Luckily the next day he was allowed to come home, but he had jaundice and had to keep going back to the doctor to give blood samples so they could monitor his bilirubin levels. I knew this was for his own good, but remember crying and calling the doctors "vampires" who were taking "all" of my baby's blood- I can be a bit dramatic.
One of my favorite drawings by Simon |
Aunt Natasha turns Simon punk rock- a sign of things to come |
Through his passion for music he has taken it upon himself to learn so much. Although we offered Simon voice lessons, he instead chose to teach himself guitar and has become a much better singer all on his own. And something I noticed almost immediaitely was his natural talent to write lyrics as well as to organize band practices and meetings, along with ideas and plans for recording, videos, albums and things like that. I have watched as band members have come and gone, yet friendships have remained strong, not letting band disputes or differences get in the way- a talent much bigger than art, music or anything else.
Mother's Day weekend before Sam and I moved to Nepal, Simon and I went to Austin. As we rode in the car Simon was in charge of the music. We listened to stuff I had never heard before as well as a few songs that I had listened to when I was his age. Then, at one point a song came on, and I thought it was one of his friends, CJ, on guitar. CJ is an incredible guitarist. I was shocked when Simon told me it was him on guitar!
Simon pursuing his dream |
But there have been many times when he has amazed me, like when he was in kindergarten. We were outside waiting for the school doors to open. It was winter and pretty cold out, and we noticed this little boy standing there in his pajamas. He was obviously embarrassed, not to mention cold. Simon walked over to him and started talking to him. The boy's parents were divorced, and he didn't have a change of clean clothes at whichever parent's house he had stayed at the night before, so here he was in his pajamas. His name was Mayonnaise. Several kids had gathered around him by then, and I figured they were about to start teasing him about his name, his pajamas and anything else they could think of. But Simon told him not to worry and that they would go find a teacher to call his other parent to bring him some clothes. That's when I noticed the kids around him weren't teasing him, they were huddling around this boy, protecting him, telling him they'd all go with him to find a teacher. Just then a teacher opened the door and all the kids walked in together to tell her. That's MY boy!
Yes, there have been more times than I care to remember when I've cried... "God, what were you thinking making me a mom? I'm no good at being a mom!" And even more times when I know Simon has said, "God, what were you thinking making HER my mom? She's NO GOOD at being a mom!"
So here we are 20 years later and things are nothing like I imagined, but I do believe things are exactly as God planned. A few years ago as I was reading my Bible, a verse that I had read many times before jumped out at me in Luke 22 (there's that 22 again). Luke 22:31-32 says, "Simon, Simon, Satan has asked to sift you as wheat. But I have prayed for you, Simon, that your faith may not fail. And when you have turned back, strengthen your brothers."
Happy 20th Birthday, Simon!
We love you, and we're so proud of you.
You truly are a gift from God.
Simon's first birthday- he liked the ice cream cake! |
My favorite picture of Sam and Simon My favorite family picture |
Birthday blessings to Simon!
ReplyDeleteThank you!
DeletePrecious!
ReplyDeleteThanks, sweet sister!
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